Heretical Jukebox

It’s All Meshugas to Me

(B. Joel, C. Srulowitz, G. Veroba)

What’s the matter with the Kiddush I’m giving
Can’t you tell that your cake’s too dry,
Maybe I should just eliminate the kugel,
Well, in our shul, you’d better not try!
 
Where have you been hiding out lately, sonny,
You can’t give a Kiddush til’ you spend a lot of money,
Everybody’s talkin’ ‘bout the right foods, funny,
But it’s all Mishegas to me…
 
What’s the matter with the chulent I’m serving,
Can’t you tell that its got no meat,
Maybe I should serve some cole slaw and salad,
That would look like you were trying to cheat,
Borrow money from your family pushka,

And serve four kugels with a healthy slice of kishka,
Potato, rice, lukshin twice, one sweet, one spice,
All a Mishegas to me!

Oh, it doesn’t matter what they serve at a Kiddush
It’ll always be the same old thing,
Your wife is gonna deal an entire Shabbos meal
And you’d better savor everything,
I’m sure you know what I mean…
Have some wine, or some Shnapps for Kiddush,
Don’t you know that I only use scotch,
Forget Red Label, just go with the green one,
Or the Blue, if it’s not too much
Plain gefilte fish is not very daring,
Your best bet would be twelve types of herring,
Cream cakes, potato knishes, table cloths, hot dishes
All a Mishegas to me
What’s the matter with the Kiddush I’m giving,
Can’t you see that the place is too tight,
Don’t you know you need at least 10 tables
If you have 80  men to invite
Nowadays, you gotta be very cautious,
Pick the wrong food and your guests will be nauseous,
Right food, right place, scotch and bourbon by the case
It’s all a Mishegas to me
Everybody’s talkin’ bout the food at the Kiddush,
But it’s all Mishegas to me!